


An Unfortunate Reunion

by TheBigLoserQueen



Series: My TFA Universe [12]
Category: Transformers - All Media Types, Transformers Animated (2007)
Genre: Angst, Autobots - Freeform, Decepticons - Freeform, Drama, Emotional Hurt, Explicit Language, Explicit Sexual Content, F/M, Het, Hurt No Comfort, Murder, One-Sided Attraction, Psychological Drama, Rape, Rape Aftermath, Sexual Content, Slash, Unrequited Love, Violence
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-08-10
Updated: 2015-08-12
Packaged: 2018-04-14 01:52:09
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Rape/Non-Con
Chapters: 5
Words: 21,475
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4545627
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/TheBigLoserQueen/pseuds/TheBigLoserQueen
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>After having seen each other in so long, Bloodshed and Thornstriker finally meet again. But the meeting doesn't go well at all.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> So now that I think I figured out the website for the most part, I decided to now upload all of my OC/AU stuff onto the site as well... Starting with the (super angsty) fic that started it all. The beginning of my OCs and AUs and thus leading to the downfall of which is my life. XD
> 
> Enjoy.

"Please!" Fender, the white and orange minibot, begged. "We can't go out without someone with us! Come on, Thornstriker! Please?!"

Thornstriker gently put down the beakers she was holding and turned to the two younglings. "Why me?" 

"Because you promised to take us when we asked!" Gadget, his twin brother who was gray and green, pointed out. "Come on! You can't bail out on us now! You promised!"

Thornstriker was in the Autobot lab working on some of her experiments with Perceptor and Wheeljack. While Perceptor remained attached to his work, but obviously observing what was happening, Wheeljack was softly laughing behind her. She glared back at him a bit, causing Wheeljack to stifle his chuckles and look back at what he had been working on.

She turned back to the twins. Yes, she had promised them to take them out one day, but never did she expect it to be so soon. Being new soldiers, she truly believed that the two of them would still be under Cliffjumper's training. Apparently, she had assumed wrong. The trainee bots must have gotten a break. Still, why did they want her to take them outside? She was scientist, a very weak on at that, not some high ranking commander or soldier that went out exploring the battlefields. They had gotten rather attached to her, though he wasn't sure why.

"But... Why not ask Ironhide or someone else to take you?"

Fender frowned a bit. "But you promised you'd take us, Thornstriker."

"Yeah," Gadget added, sounding a bit hurt. "Come on, Thornstriker. Please? We only want to go with you."

The scientist rubbed her helm. Ever since the two minibots came into the Autobot base, they stuck to her like space barnacles. Still, it was cute for the two younger mechs to depend on her like a guardian. It wasn't common for others to be like that with her. In a way, it was sweet and she found it difficult to say no to them.

She sighed in defeated. "All right. But only for a little while, understand? Now give me a minute or two."

"Yes!" they cried in unison, smiling brightly before running out of the room.

Thornstriker stared at the door they had just exited. "Why do I feel like I was tricked?"

Wheeljack laughed. "Because you were. They always say things like that to you and you fall for it easily." He looked back up from his project with a smirk on his face. "I'm worried that they're taking advantage of you sometimes. You're too nice."

She frowned; it was like having a positive character trait was a bad thing. "Well, I'm sorry for being nice. Why don't I just start acting like that new bot, Sentinel Prime? I should start asking him to train me in that field of character, shouldn't I?"

"We're not suggesting you to go to the extreme, Thornstriker," Perceptor interjected, shaking his helm. "Just put your pede down more and maybe you shouldn't be manipulated as easily. Besides, you couldn't be that obnoxious even if you wanted to. That type of egotism is one you are created with."

The three of them laughed once before Thornstriker sighed. "Well, I'm going. If my brother comes back early, tell him I went out."

"He said he and his team wouldn't be back for another three days, Thornstriker," Wheeljack said. "He told me yesterday."

"Oh. All right." She started walking out of the lab. "I should be back in a few fours. I'll contact you when the twins and I are coming back."

"Come back immediately after you're done," Perceptor said. "The High Council has a meeting today and I need you to look after my experiments."

Thornstriker nodded and gave a soft smile. "All right. I'll keep that in my processor."

* * *

The twins were more excited about traveling outside the base than Thornstriker had deduced. They were racing around like sparklings, chasing each other around, playing some silly tag game. Thornstriker was sitting up on a small ledge, watching them in mild amusement, though most of her attention was focused on the Cybertronian landscape. She sighed softly, finding herself becoming depressed as she thought about how this site would probably soon be the homeland of yet another battleground.

She hated this war. It was stupid. It had been so long that many had forgotten why they were truly fighting. Now, it was just to beat the other side and make sure they didn't take over completely. In all truth, this war could have ended peacefully or maybe not have even begun. Yet, the leaders of both factions were too proud and too stubborn to think this through. She meant no disrespect toward the Magnus, but how she wished the Autobot leader and the High Council had thought this through better. Yet now, because of this war, the animosity between the two sides had reached an irrevocable height. 

Now, her side had to win for not only the sake of this planet and future generations, but for their own well-beings. Every Autobot knew that if the Decepticons were to take over, it would mean complete anarchy. The planet and maybe even hundreds more that surrounded this one would succumb to the evils of the Decepticons. They wanted an empire and they were more than ready to make one. The Autobots would be completely annihilated or be turned into slaves. The thought made her shudder. Honestly, she wouldn't be sure whether she would pick to live in hell or live under Decepticon servitude. Was there even a difference? She highly doubted it.

She snapped out of her thoughts when she heard the two minibots laugh hysterically, transforming into vehicle mode and taking off from her sights. "Wait! Come back here!"

“You have to catch us first!” Fender yelled out, causing both twins to howl out in laughter.

Thornstriker groaned and quickly transformed into her vehicle-mode, racing after the troublemakers. Seriously, these two were going to get themselves seriously hurt because of their rambunctious behavior. As she chased after him, the two split up; Fender went toward the walls of the mountainous region up ahead and Gadget took off in the direction toward the vast horizon. Thornstriker debated for a moment with herself as to who to go after, eventually chasing after Gadget first.

Though she wasn’t at all the soldier type, the scientist was still faster than them. Certainly nothing like Blurr, but her speed was one of her only redeeming qualities when it came to fighting. Mainly because she could get away much quicker. She was able to corner him off and transformer back into her robot form, Gadget doing the same with a big smile on his face.

“Welp. You got me.”

“Yes. And now we need to catch your brother and then we’re going home.”

His optics widening, looking shocked and hurt for a moment. “But why-?!”

“Because you two are too reckless to be out here and you tried to run off on your own. I think you’ve both had enough excitement for one day.”

Gadget whined, but Thornstriker paid little mind to him.

“Come on, don’t be like that,” he said as she started looking for his brother. He quickly followed her. “Besides, we’re fine! Me and my brother can protect ourselves and you from some thug Cons.”

Thornstriker only gave a heavy sigh and shook her helm. That arrogance of his was going to get him hurt. Maybe even killed. But she supposed that was what younger mechs and femmes believed: that they were invisible and nothing could touch them.

While looking for Fender, they came across a small cave at the bottom of a mountainous terrain. Thornstriker could see tracks leading inside. Well, at least he didn’t pick a more difficult hiding spot. Walking in front of Gadget, Thornstriker peered inside to look for the other mech.

“Fender,” she called out. “Come on, we’re going back to the base.” When she didn’t receive a reply, she slowly ventured further inside. “Fender! Let’s go back–”

She suddenly felt the ground beneath her crumble. Gadget gasped as his guardian fell through the floor, who let out a scream as she fell. It was a short fall, thankfully, but her back still hit the ground hard. She could have sworn heard something break on impact, but she didn’t think much of it as the pain in her back was much more prominent. She groaned hard as she rolled over on her stomach in hopes to relieve the pain, which only helped a little.

“Thornstriker!” She looked up to see both Gadget and Fender – who had come out of his hiding place – standing over the hole where she fell from. 

“Are you all right?” one of them called out.

“Y-Yes… Yes, I’m all right, thank you.” Slowly, she sat up, biting back a groan. All right, everything seemed fine… But when she tried to stand up, she let out a cry of pain and crumpled to the floor. 

“Thornstriker?!

She panted hard, looking down at her legs. Her optics widened. At the base of her leg, right above her pede, there was a large gash with blood spilling out of it. Wirings were poking out of the cut, small and almost unnoticeable sparks flickering every other second. She could feel some dents on her back, along with some scrapes and scratches on the rest of her frame, but those could be buffed out later. Quickly, she did an internal scan of herself. Luckily, everything else was fine, but her transmission link had shattered on impact, leaving her unable to contact anyone.

At least she wasn’t alone on this and still had a way to get help. Looking back up at the minibots, she yelled out, “I need you to contact help. I need medical attention.”

“Are you-?!”

“N-No, no, I’ll be all right, but it would be best if I got help sooner rather than later.”

“Want one of us to come down?”

“I’m fine, thank you.”

“Okay,” Fender said. “We’ll be outside the cave - our signals are jammed. So just sit tight, okay?”

There wasn’t much else she could do. Still, giving a small sigh, she moved positioned herself so that she was sitting up and against the wall. It certainly relieved the tension and pain off her leg, so at least it worked.

Meanwhile, the two minibots had to drive a bit away from the cave when they realized that their signals were still jammed and headed back toward the area they were first hanging out by before they decided to take off. They didn’t want to leave Thornstriker alone, but they needed to get her help. She sounded like she had seriously hurt herself from that fall…

“You think she’s mad at us?” Fender asked.

“I don’t think so…”

“But she got really hurt–”

“She said it wasn’t serious. Besides, all we have to do is-”

A laugh suddenly broke through. It was a soft laugh, but definitely nothing friendly or pleasant about it. No, it was much more dangerous… and from a femme.

“You should just give up now,” the voice said. “You’re not going to be able to contact anyone for a long time.”

The pair whipped around to find a rather beautiful, almost provocative, Decepticon femme sitting on a pile of rocks places slightly above them. Their optics widened and they quickly stepped back when she jumped down from her spot, landing right in front of at them. They couldn’t move, having never dealt with an actual Decepticon before and never one who was this sexy. They were completely off guard and didn’t know what to think, giving the femme some time to study over them.

Fender stiffened when she slowly extended out a hand towards him, her long and sharp fingers gently seizing his chin. He felt his spine shiver when her bright red optics pierced into his. A small smirk crawled onto her face place, one that actually caused fear to resonate through Gadget and made backed away from her. Fender just stared at her, completely mesmerized with her presence.

“Leaving your friend alone… Was that really such a wise idea?” She drew back her hand and slowly began to circle them, studying over them as they kept their sights on her. The two could sense that she was dangerous just by the way she was looking at them, like pieces of meat.

Axle gulped a little, finding his voice. “Who… Who are you?”

“Is that really something you should be asking a Decepticon?” She laughed once. “You’re both quite cute… And stupidly naïve, considering I’m pretty sure I have a reputation.”

“Hey, you’re not the only one, you know.”

The new voice, this one loud and booming, made the Autobots jump a bit while the femme just rolled her optics. They jerked their helms up and froze when they saw another Decepticon, a dark blue and black seeker, up in the air with a crazed smile on his face.

The femme rolled her eyes as he landed next to her, folding her arms across her chassis. “Someone’s a little late.”

The other just smiled before they both looked back to the two Autobots frozen in place. It made the purple femme laugh as she walked over to them, titling her helm.

“What’s wrong? You two don’t look so good.” She raised up her pede. “Why don’t you take a seat?” She slammed her raised pede straight into Gadget’s abdomen, who went flying backwards a good thirty feet.

The seeker burst into giggles and clapped. “Nice one! Though you’ve done better.”

“Gadget!” Fender cried out, running over to his fallen brother. The other groaned as he tried to help the other up, glaring back at the femme and seeker as they stepped closer. He quickly pulled out his fun and aimed it at them, optics narrowing. “Get back!”

They both stopped, though it was more out of surprise if anything else. The mech titled his helm to side while the femme just rested her hands on her hips.

“Really? You wanna try pointing a gun on us?”

The seeker smiled. “I don’t think he knows our squad leader is. That’s why he’s acting so brave.”

“Stay back, damn it, or I’ll-!”

“Get yourselves killed while you leave your little friend told in that trench?”

Both of their optics widened in horror. How did they know about Thornstriker? How did they realize that she was down there?!

“I caught sight of you guys just as you all ducked into that little cave,” the seeker said, smiling. “If you two wanna play so bad, I can leave you with my friend Nebula here while I go play with your friend.”

“Don’t you touch her, you fucking-!”

Before Fender could finish his sentence, the femme, Nebula had already come up to him and easily kicked the gun out of his hand. He could barely react when she suddenly brought her pede down, smacking him hard across the helm and causing him to fall next to his brother. He groaned in pain, trying to collect his bearings as she backed away from them.

“I don’t think you’re in the position to be talking back to me like that,” she said, smirking as she rested her hands on her hips.

“Oh~~~ now you two are in trouble~”

“Nova. Nebula. Enough.”

Everyone turned to look behind the two Decepticons, a large and rather tall red mech coming into view. Gadget paled when he saw the mech come closer, instantly recognizing him. One of the more dangerous, deadly Decepticons… The kind that the sergeants warned recruits about when training them. Bloodshed. The only son of the General of the Decepticon Ground Forces, Bombrush, who was one of Megatron’s most trusted and closest officers. A mech who never showed mercy, much like his teammates. Not many Autobots lived to tell the tale about their encounters with this mech.

None of the Decepticons seemed to notice or even care that the Autobots were staring to tremble in fear, no longer the confident and arrogant mechs they had been with Thornstriker earlier.

“You’re seriously no fun, Bloodshed,” Nebula said, rubbing the back of her neck. “All you do is hate on everything we do.”

He ignored her as he looked at the two mechs on the floor, who froze up when they made eye contact.

“Where’s the third one?”

“Don’t know,” Novabomb said, shrugging his shoulders. He sounded bored, a complete contrast to the fear Fender and Gadget felt surging through them. “All I know is that these two were told to get help.”

Bloodshed nodded before studying over them. Immediately, he knew they were just trainees. From what he understood, Autobot rules had it so that trainees were required to have a responsible guardian present. Considering who his father was and for being a warrior for as long as he had, it was easy to tell what the enemy’s function was and what rank they were in. If he wasn’t spot on, he was usually close when it came to guessing.

Fender suddenly gasped out in pain when he felt pressure on his leg. His optics shot down and widened when he saw Bloodshed’s pede lightly pressing on where his pede and leg connected. He tensed and looked up at the other.

“Where’s your guardian?” he demanded.

“Get off of him–” Gadget’s attempt to snarl at him was cut off when Novabomb kicked him, making him groan in pain as the seeker tisked him.

“He’s not talking to you, Autobot. Let him speak with your friend, hmm?”

When Fender didn’t say anything, Bloodshed simply applied more pressure on Fender’s leg, making the trainee grit his dentals together in pain. “I’ll make sure this leg comes off unless you tell me where your guardian is.”

Fender still didn’t say anything. Like hell he was going to tell this mech where Thornstriker was… These guys… Primus, they would kill her. Maybe torture her first, he had no idea. But he knew that she wasn’t a match for any of these three, especially not while she was injured. He had to protect her, even if it meant more pain for him.

When the bot still refused to speak, Bloodshed rolled his optics, becoming impatient. Stubborn little shit, he would give him that, but he didn’t really want to deal with this. He removed his pede, but then promptly grabbed the poor soldier by the neck. Fender gagged and attempted to kick at him, but it was useless as the mech picked him and held him close to his face.

“Where’s your guardian?” he repeated, his voice much colder now. “They have to be nearby… Or did they abandon you when they saw us coming?”

“Go fuck yourself…!” Fender managed to choke out, using his fingers to claw into Bloodshed’s armor.

The Decepticon huffed. This was getting nowhere. He shoved him back onto the floor, making him land on his brother before turning to his teammates. He pointed in the direction of the cave. “You said they came from that direction?”

“Heard them say they would get help for their friend…” Nebula said, giving a shrug. “That’s probably where their guardian’s at. Want us to head on over there?”

Bloodshed nodded. “Don’t do anything until I get over there.” He turned away from them to face the Autobots, who were struggling to get to their pedes. “I’ll take care of these two.”

The Autobots froze up in horror. No… No, they were going after Thornstriker! She couldn’t defend herself against these guys! Gadget shook his helm frantically and tried to get up and fight these guys. If they hurt Thornstriker, he was going to make them pay!

“Don’t you dare hurt her-”  

“You should be more worried about yourselves than your guardian right now,” Bloodshed said darkly as his teammates drove off. 

The twins just stared in horror as the massive form towered over them, knowing the only chance they had of escaping was to fight the Decepticon, even if they knew they had no chance.  


	2. Chapter 2

Thornstriker couldn’t help but to let out a sigh. She couldn’t help but wonder what was taking those two so long? She knew their signals were jammed inside the cave, so they had to step out, but they should have gotten help by now. And she would have hoped that one of them would have come back once they had made the call. 

Oh well. Maybe Red Alert or whoever they contacted told them to wait outside. Primus, no doubt someone had contacted her brother… She just hoped Airstream wouldn’t go completely haywire over this.

She heard some rocks crumble down from the hole above her, making her glance up. She couldn’t see anything… Way too dark to focus in on anything. Then again, that could have just been due to something being wrong caused by the fall. She hoped it was nothing permanent and that Red Alert could easily fix it. Maybe she was just overreacting. The fall hadn’t been that bad. It could have been way worse.

She suddenly heard footsteps. Oh. Fender or Gadget had returned. Just as she turned to greet them, her voice caught in her throat when she locked optics with the dark purple femme. The other was just as surprised as she was, staring back at her with wide optics and an agape mouth. She would have been terrified by the fact that a Decepticon was standing in front of her, but she just couldn’t be. Not when it was her old roommate back in the Academy before the war started.

Thornstriker wouldn’t have said that she and Nebula were incredibly close friends or anything of the sort, but they had been friends… At least she had thought they were; she had no idea how the other femme felt about her. But she had been friends with her and her two mech friends, Novabomb and Bloodshed. Bloodshed especially, being closer to him out of the three of them. Mainly because he had always been so nice to her back before the war…

But they were now in the war. Nebula was a Decepticon. She was an Autobot and an injured one at that. Suddenly remembering her situation, Thornstriker froze up in fear and flinched away, only to hiss out in pain at the sudden jolt.

Nebula opened her mouth to speak when a loud voice suddenly boomed, “Find them, Nebula? Or should I keep looking?”

Both femmes looked up, though Thornstriker more out of surprise and fear. Oh Primus… That was Novabomb’s voice. What was with this strange and sudden reunion?!

“You can come down.”

That only made Thornstriker freeze up even more. Oh Primus, oh Primus, she was dead. They were going to kill her. Maybe they didn’t remember her? Maybe they just thought she was an easy target, being an injured Autobot all by herself, trapped in this cave… Wait. Where were Fender and Gadget? Oh no… Had they-?!

Novabomb suddenly plopped down next to Nebula, smiling brightly as he turned to look at the Autobot. But he blinked when he caught sight of her frightened face, taken aback a bit. Wait… She looked… familiar.

He titled his helm. “You… We know you, right?”

Nebula had to roll her optics. “Nova, it’s Thornstriker.”

“Oh… Oh. OH!”

Thornstriker just stared at them, trembling a bit. Well… They had remembered her, at least. But was that a bad thing? A good thing? She drowned out their chattering, trying to figure out what to do. Should she run away? Should she try and fight back? While they didn’t seem to be interested in attacking her at the moment, she knew that could change in an instant. But there was no way she could run or fight. Not in her current state. It didn’t stop her from trying to stand up though.

She winced in pain as she tried to balance herself, hissing out when her leg screamed in pain. It made both Decepticons look at her with blank expressions. She just froze up and stared back, unsure of what she should do.

Novabomb’s optics fell to her injured leg and arched his optic ridges. “Looks like someone’s got a busted up leg.”

Thornstriker said nothing.

“If you’re thinking of running, I don’t think that would be a good idea.” He smiled, flashing his brilliant white dentals to her. “You won’t get very far.”

The poor femme tensed up in fright, evidentially collapsing to the floor out pain and terror.

Nebula rolled her optics and glared at the seeker, who just held up his hands innocently. Idiot. Scaring her would just get them both in trouble… It was bad enough she was injured. Bloodshed would probably think they did something, though she hoped not. They just found her like this. They knew better than to lay a hand on the femme he had been in love with for Vorns now. That was just suicidal.

Still, she was shocked to see her here. She had been those two mechs’ guardian? Thornstriker, that weak little femme from the Academy? Sure, she was incredibly smart and could outrun an enemy if necessary, but she wasn’t guardian material. Not by a long shot… Unless those mechs were hoping to impress her and woo her over? Damn, now she was curious and wish she had gotten some answers out of those bots.

Oh well. They were dead now anyway.

She let out a small huff and looked to the femme, who tensed up when they locked optics. “So… Wasn’t expecting to run into you ever again. How have you been?”

Thornstriker didn’t answer.

Novabomb frowned and gave a rather childish pout. “I don’t remember you being this rude before.”

“Wh-Where-?”

“Where what?”

“W-Where… Where are my charges?”

“Oh, those minibots? Probably dead by now, since Bloodshed took care of them.”

“Nova!”

“What?!” he cried, not expecting his friend to hiss at him like that. “I’m just telling the truth!”

Thornstriker was too horrified to follow the rest of their argument. Fender? Gadget? Dead? And by… Bloodshed. By Bloodshed’s hand. The red mech who had been so kind to her, so sweet and gentle… and had gone on to become one of the more feared Decepticons, had murdered the two mechs she had been in charge of… Two mechs she was supposed to have taken care of. But because she got herself stuck down here, they were dead. And it was all her fault. 

She cupped her hands over her mouth, trying to keep herself from crying. But she was shaking hard, both in fear and in grief, and she could feel tears burning at the corners of her optics. She had gotten those mechs killed and now she was next. These two… They were no longer her friends. They were Decepticons and they were going to kill her. She prayed it would be swift and that they wouldn’t torture her out of mercy.

Novabomb’s optics widened when he saw how badly she was shaking. Right… Oops. She was an Autobot. This wasn’t the Academy anymore. “I think we made her cry.”

“That’s because you can’t keep your fucking mouth shut.” Shit, now they had to get her to calm down and fast. Primus only knew how quickly Bloodshed had disposed of those two short mechs. And if he saw her crying and bleeding the way that she was, he would probably blame them and try to kill them.

Just as she was about to step towards the weeping scientist, they all heard someone climbing down into the trench. While Novabomb and Nebula turned to the newcomer, Thornstriker didn’t bother looking up, knowing exactly who this third person was. She just hoped that death would be swift, that her old friends would show her mercy and just be done with her quickly.

Nebula cursed to herself. She had been hoping they would have been able to get Thornstriker to stop crying before he got here, but looks like they would have to face his wrath… She would have to make sure to hide herself behind Novabomb, so he could take the bulk of their captain’s anger.

“Oh, Bloodshed!” Novabomb cried, pursing his lips. Oh dear… He was covered in blood. That wouldn’t be good for little Thornstriker’s spark. “You’re looking pretty messy, you know.” 

Bloodshed looked down at himself but remained silent.  

Nebula looked back at the mech before glanced back at the Autobot. She was sniffling and sobbing quietly to herself, no doubt scared shitless. It didn’t help that Bloodshed had just showed up either… Shit, she needed to do or say something, probably quickly.

“Uh, Blood-”

“That the guardian?”

“Uh…” She could see him peering over her shoulder to look at the green femme. “Well, yeah, but, listen-”

Bloodshed just observed of what he could see of the Autobot. He was surprised by how small and frail they looked. Definitely not guardian material… Was this another trainee and their guardian was somewhere else? But from what he could see, there was a wound on their leg and they were bleeding pretty badly.

He glared at Nebula. “I thought I had told you to not do anything.”

She quickly put her hands up. “Hey, we didn’t do shit.”

“Yeah!” Novabomb said. “We found her like that!”

“… I see.”

Well, at least he believed them. Or was just hoping to get Novabomb to shut up, Nebula had no idea. Still, she gave a soft huff and shook her helm, glancing back at the weeping Autobot behind her. She had to find a way to say this carefully so the other wouldn’t flip out or overreact. He had been like that in the Academy and she knew just how… protective Bloodshed was over the femme.

“Listen, Blood–”

“You’ll never guess who it is!” Novabomb sang, walking past his friends to kneel down next to the Autobot, who was still huddled up and weeping to herself. Gently, he grabbed her arm and coaxed her out of her curled up position.

“N-NO!” she cried out. “L-Leave me alone!”

Bloodshed stiffened a bit when he heard that voice. He knew that voice with that light, sweet accent that made had always made him feel better in the past. But… it couldn’t be her. He hadn’t seen her for in such a long time. Someone like her… He had thought that maybe she had found refuge on another planet. Or worse, had been killed. There was no way she would be a soldier…

Then he looked down to see Novabomb had gently made Thornstriker look at him, tears in the corners of her optics as she just stared at him in fright. He could only stare at her with wide optics. Impossible. It was Nebula’s old roommate that he had fallen in love with at the Academy. But she… Thornstriker shouldn’t have been here. She couldn’t be…  

Nebula noticed the deadpanned look on Bloodshed’s face and bit her lip. Shit, she needed to start talking fast to explain everything. “Look, Bloodshed, we just sort of found her down here… We weren’t sure what to do, so we just… waited around for you…”

Bloodshed still said nothing as he just stared at the green femme, who was shaking violently as she stared at him. His optics fell to her leg, tensing up when he realized she was hurt. He turned to Nebula, who just shrugged.

“She was like that when we got here.”

He looked to Novabomb, who just nodded in agreement with the purple femme as he let Thornstriker crumble to the floor in fright. The poor Autobot was shaking like mad, tears pouring down her faceplates. No doubt she was terrified out of her processor… He glanced down at his body. Shit, he had forgotten; he was covered in blood.

“You want these?”

Snapping out of his thoughts, he looked over at Nebula, who was holding out a med kit to him. Right… Right. Thornstriker was hurt. She needed helped. She needed one of them. Damn the war, he always put her first, even if they hadn’t seen each other in years.

Sensing the atmosphere, Nebula huffed and looked to Novabomb. “Come on, let’s bail.”

“Huh?” Both Novabomb and Bloodshed seemed surprised by the offer.

“Me and Nova will head back. We’ll tell them you had some shit to take care of, okay?”

Bloodshed didn’t say anything, still lost with what she meant. But Novabomb seemed to get what she was trying to do. Right. They hadn’t seen each other in ages. Not to mention it was probably scaring Thornstriker half to death to be surrounded by three Decepticons. He thought about protesting though, considering Bloodshed was covered in the blood of her charges, but he didn’t want Nebula to get angry and force him out.

Giving his captain a bright smile, he waved to him before he and Nebula quickly left before Bloodshed could try to stop them. Now it was just him and Thornstriker. Alone. Down in this little cave. Together. And alone.

He heard a sniffle behind him, making him look over and see Thornstriker curled up on the ground, staring at the Decepticon with frightened optics. Biting his lip, he stepped toward her. The Autobot gasped and attempted to scramble to her pedes, but it was too much for her legs to handle and she fell back to the floor with a small cry.  

Bloodshed should have thought about it more clearly when he rushed to her side. It was out of pure instinct, gently moving his arms around her delicate frame. Thornstriker gasped and jerked her helm to look at the other, optics widening when she felt him lift her up into his chassis, holding her firmly against him.

She shoved against the other in an attempt to get away, but he wouldn’t budge. Bloodshed was way too strong and she was injured. There was no way she would be able to get away.

“L-Let me go!” she cried, struggling against him. “Please! L-Let go!” 

It pained him to see the other so afraid of him, but Bloodshed said nothing as he carried her over to the rocky walls. She squirmed and whimpered in fright, even when he gently set her down onto the floor. His optics widened when she attempted to get up and run, forcing him to pin her down with his weight.

“N-No! S-Stop!”

“I… I’m not going to hurt you.”

Thornstriker tried to kick him, but he blocked her pede easily. She grew even more frantic when she found herself trapped against the wall. Unable to do anything, she just stared at the mech who towered over her, trying to think what he wanted to do. She wanted to trust him. She wanted to think he was the same mech from back at the Academy, the one who took care of her, the one who was always kind to her…

“Thornstriker.”

She stiffened when she heard her name, but did nothing except watch the mech as he looked at her with gentle optics.

“… I’m not going to hurt you,” he repeated softly, optics falling to her injuries. “Just… Stay still. I’m not a medic, but I can still treat your injuries. So don’t move… Okay?”

Thornstriker didn’t say anything, biting her bottom lip before looking away. As if she could move… Even though he moved a bit away from her, there was no way she would be able to outrun him. Not with her injury. So she decided to just stay there and keep quiet, biting back a whimper when he gently brought out her leg to rest on front of him.

It pained Bloodshed to see her so terrified of him. Even though he was only doing a quick inspection, the poor Autobot was trembling like crazy. Primus, even the way she looked at him… it was as if he were a monster. And maybe he was one, considering all the sins he had committed in his lifetime.

Taking a deep breath, he very cautiously and very gently brought a hand to her cheek and seized the side of her face, titling her upward to look at him

Thornstriker gasped, terror seeping in her spark. But she was taken aback when she was greeted with Bloodshed’s solemn expression, the red optics filled with genuine concern. She opened her mouth to speak, but the words died on her glossa. Why was he looking at her like that? It bewildered her, especially when the Decepticon gently rubbed his thumb over her lips. She shivered a bit and she was surprised that it caused Bloodshed pulled away.

“Thornstriker, I… I know you’re scared,” he murmured softly. “But… Please. I’m not going to kill you. I understand why… you don’t believe me, but… But I mean it. I won’t hurt you. I promise.”

Thornstriker didn’t say anything. She could only stare at him with wide optics. Bloodshed… He said he wouldn’t hurt her. He said he promised he wouldn’t… The same Bloodshed from back at the Academy promised to protect her too, if she ever needed it. And she wanted to trust him. She wanted to believe that things were still the same, that he would protect her. That he wouldn’t hurt her.

But when her optics fell to his chassis… His bloody chassis. He had murdered her charges and was now wearing their blood on his body almost like a coat of paint. As if it were nothing. He… Her old friend… was a murderer. She couldn’t trust a murderer.

Seeing her tremble again and look away, Bloodshed gave a heavy, defeated huff and simply took her silence as reluctant permission to continue. While he couldn’t repair the pede, he could at least get the bleeding to stop. But as he was tending to her injury, he couldn’t help but to look over her tiny frame every now and then. Primus, she… she was just so small and frail. So weak…

He accidentally hit a sensitive wire, causing Thornstriker to hiss in pain. Bloodshed looked up at her, concerned. “Did I hurt you?”

She didn’t say anything again, simply flinching back when he spoke.

Feeling a bit hurt, but understanding why, Bloodshed quietly resumed attending to her leg. He noticed that the Autobot was whimpering and twitching when his hands trailed lightly over her body. It seemed as though whenever his hands would accidentally brush against her back or her horns, Thornstriker would shudder and let out a light gasp. He wondered if those areas were just overly sensitive.

It was too much for the little femme. She was terrified of what the other would do. Yes, Bloodshed had been kind to her in the past. She had trusted him when they were just schoolmates, but this was different. They were at war on opposing sides. Primus, his entire chassis was covered in the blood of her charges! He had murdered them… And he would probably kill her too.

“S-Stop it!” she finally shrieked, smacking his hands away from her in fright. “J-Just stop! L-Leave me alone!”

“Thorn–”

“No! D-Don’t touch me, don’t!”

Thornstriker desperately tried to get up and run away, but she was only able to stand up for a second. Her injured leg easily gave out under her panic and weight. And Bloodshed, not wanting her to hurt herself any further, reached out to her and caught her before she hit the floor. But when she felt his arm wrap securely around her waist to pull her to him, she screamed in terror and turned her body to kick at him.

“N-No! Let me go! Please!”

“Thornstriker, stop-”

“NO!”

A loud smack echoed through the cave when her tiny little hand collided into his cheek. He hadn’t been expecting it, so the force and weight behind the hit actually caused his face to turn to the side. He still held onto her, but he couldn’t look back at her, still in shock that she had actually slapped him.

He could feel her shaking, which made him finally turn to face her with wide, blank optics. The Autobot just stared at him, trembling hard with tears pooling up in the corners of her own optics as complete fear washed over her.

She… hit him. She had actually hit him. Thornstriker was a very gentle person and probably would hurt a micro-fly… But she was so terrified of him that she had actually _slapped_ him across the face. She looked at him like he was some sort of monster. Staring at him with a look he had never wanted to see from her. Anyone but her. And yet, now… Because of his actions… Because of what he had done…

To her, he was the worst kind of monster.

He didn’t even seem to realize that his hands were starting to shake. No… No, he didn’t want this. He didn’t want her to think of him like that… Anyone but her. He didn’t care if the entire universe hated him, but not Thornstriker. He couldn’t _stand_ the idea of her hating him… Fearing him…

He didn’t want to hear it. He didn’t want to believe it. Just thinking about it was driving him insane. Why? Why was she afraid him? He hadn’t done anything to her! He had never done anything to hurt her, never and yet…

“What did I do?”

Thornstriker stiffened at the dark, almost pained voice.

“What have I done…? I’ve never… Not _once_ have ever hurt you… I only… It’s my…” His hand tightened around her arm, making her flinch. “Why… Why do you…?

He stopped once he looked up at her, seeing the fear on her face with tears in her optics. He couldn’t bare it. It made him want to scream. Why? Why was this happening? All he had ever wanted to do was love her. All he ever wanted was for her to treat him as she always had. Like a normal person… Like someone she cared about. 

He couldn’t bare it. Not when he loved her so much.

Thornstriker shrieked when he easily yanked her forward, expecting him to beat her up. But what she wasn’t expecting was his hands to cup the back of her helm and her lower back and pull her in for a desperate kiss.

She froze for a moment, trying to comprehend what was happening. Bloodshed… His mouth was on hers. His glossa pushed past her lip plates. Her body felt cold as she slowly started to comprehend what was going on, especially when he started to push her back down onto the ground, his waist somehow getting in between her lips.

“Mmmm! MMM!” 

The Autobot pushed hard at his chassis, desperately trying to separate their lips and end the kiss. Oh Primus, what was he doing?!

Bloodshed released her lips when he felt her hands on his chassis, but he only moved to start kissing at her thin neck cables. Poor Thornstriker trembled hard beneath him, trying to wiggle away from but with no luck. No matter how much she pushed and struggled against him, he wouldn’t let go!

“S-Stop it!”

Bloodshed couldn’t. She already hated him… He was already a monster to her. Nothing he did would ever change that. And even though he couldn’t bear the thought… Did it even matter anymore? They would probably never see each other again. And she would forever think him a monster while he would probably end up being killed in battle one day.

So, if he was a monster, then… Then he just wanted this, at least before he eventually died.

Bloodshed licked her neck cables, causing the femme to flinch. “Just relax. I won’t hurt you.”

“Please!” she shrieked. “Let me go! I-I won’t tell anyone I saw you! I-I swear, just please! D-Don’t!”

Unable to bear the fear in her voice, he kissed her again and shoved his glossa. He kept his optics open, being able to see the horror in her own beautiful blue optics as she stared back at him. Primus, she was even starting to cry… And even though he loathed seeing her like this, he didn’t stop. He just continued to kiss her and held her to him.

Thornstriker felt her entire body grow cold. Her wirings were numbing in terror. And the look in the mech’s optics… the look in them was one she didn’t quite understand, though she was certain she had seen it before from other mechs. But even then, the look right now… She could see some bestial, feral hunger within them that just made her inner wirings freeze.

Bloodshed broke the kiss again to lick up the side of his face. Thornstriker whimpered and pushed against the bigger mech, letting out a small gasp when she felt his glossa at her horns. No! No, those were sensitive!

“S-Stop…! AH!”

He closed his optics as he kissed on the right horn on her head. He could feel her flinch and squirm in his arms, hearing her let out small moans and cries whenever he dragged his glossa across the delicate metal. He should have figured these were sensitive; she had politely asked Nebula not to touch them when those two had been roommates.

Slowly, he moved one of his hands down her tiny frame. Thornstriker struggled beneath him, desperately trying to get away from him as she pushed at his shoulders and chassis. The mech didn’t even budge. He only gently trailed down his hand to her groin plating, cupping it before rubbing the warm metal. The licks to her horns must have been making her hot…

Bloodshed started to suckle of them, drawing a sharp shriek from the little femme as she unconsciously bucked her hips against his hand. “No…! Please! Let me go!”

“Open up,” he murmured softly.

“N-No! S-Stop-AH! AH!”

Bloodshed suckled at the very tip of the little horn, feeling her plating become even hotter than before. Primus, he could even lightly feel lubricant leaking out of the seams.

“Open up,” he repeated, his voice much more forceful and demanding. He didn’t want to sound so menacing, but he didn’t want to have to force her plating open either.

Luckily, it was enough for the shaking scientist to listen. Shutting her optics tightly, she slowly allowed her valve plating to retract, revealing her pink damp opening to the other. Primus, she felt sick… She was so scared and where the Decepticon touched her made her feel so weird. She just wanted him to stop, but he just wouldn’t let her go…

What had happened to the Bloodshed she knew back in the Academy? Why had he killed her charged? Why was he doing this? She was so confused…

The Decepticon just stared at her opening for a few moments, his breathing getting heavier as his arousal grew. Primus… That was her valve. Her pretty little valve. Though he hated to admit it, it was something he only fantasized about seeing. Touching. Feeling. He never thought that he would actually be able to do all of that in real life…

He pressed his hand gently against it, causing Thornstriker to shriek and push hard against the mech’s shoulders.

“No! N-No, stop!”

Bloodshed’s lips dove for her neck, holding her closer to him as she started to struggle harder. Then, gently, he brushed two fingers over her gaping entrance, feeling the insides twitch against the digits.

“NO!”

Her fear and panic went into overdrive, and with all the strength he could muster, she pushed and shoved against the mech. Bloodshed didn’t even budge. Her struggling only grew to be a nuisance to the Decepticon, who quickly fixed it by pinning her to the wall with his weight, one hand seizing her wrists and pinning them down too. His hand remained at his port, his two fingers now circling the rim.

“S-Stop! N-Ngh…! A-Ah! D-Don’t! Don’t!”

He watched in lust as lubricant from her port, the sweet pink fluid dripping onto his fingers. The more he suckled on her neck and the more his fingers danced around her opening, the wetter she became. And she was letting out such soft, erotic sounds in between her pleading… It made him want to hear even more.

“AH!”

Slowly, he pushed a finger inside of her, causing her to squirm and whimper loudly. Her tears doubled as the finger pushed deeper inside, wiggling around and rubbing up against her inner walls. Bloodshed was surprised at how tight it was. He would have thought it be looser than this. It was only tight like this when bots were still –

He froze when it finally hit him. And for a moment, he didn’t think he could even believe it.

How could she still be a virgin? It wasn’t as if he had expected Thornstriker to sleep around, no, not at all. But he knew that he wasn’t the only one who was interested in her. Primus, back in their Academy days, he had overheard some of his colleagues talk about her. How they wanted to get with “that cute little nerd bot.” And she had that friend, Warpath, who was clearly interested in her. Even though she had been oblivious to most of that.

Bloodshed had thought for sure that she and Warpath would have at least gotten together. He had thought that Warpath would use the war as his chance to be with her… But no. He had been wrong. Thornstriker was a virgin. An innocent, scared virgin he had pinned beneath him with his finger inside her tight valve.

His spark twisted in guilt. Could he really do this to her? Even if he would never get another chance like this… She was a virgin. This would be her first time. With… With a monster like him. A part of him wanted to stop, and yet… What difference would it really make? He had already come this far. It wouldn’t really matter even if he stopped now.  

He leaned down and licked the tears from the Autobot’s optics, causing Thornstriker to flinch back. “Shh… Calm down. If… If you don’t want it to hurt, you need to relax.”

Thornstriker moaned and trembled even more, shaking her helm frantically. “P-Please…!” she begged, thrashing against him and trying to free her arms.

Shushing her, he gently wiggled his finger around inside of her, not wanting to accidentally tear her port and cause physical damage. It made Thornstriker whimper and hiss out, trying to hold in her low moans. But they kept escaping past her lips, the poor thing unable to keep her voice down. Or keep her valve from getting even wetter from the gentle administration.

“Pl-Please… N-No more… Please…!”

But Bloodshed just ignored her as gently pushed in another finger. She shrieked and threw back her helm as the added stretch, panting hard and shaking at her insides spasmed in an attempt to adjust. To make it even worse, she was actually getting wet. Her valve was eagerly supplying him with more lubricant, allowing him to rub his fingers around and curl them against the tight walls.

Thornstriker couldn’t stop herself from letting out small moans, which only made her tears run faster. She felt sick. She wanted to die. Why couldn’t he just kill her?! Why was he doing this? Making her feel these… weird, strange sensations. Her valve was hot and her body felt heavy in a hazy, numbing buzz. She could hear her spark pounding in her audios and felt like something wanted to come out as her stomach felt tight. What was happening to her? Why was this happening to her?

It didn’t help that the mech’s touches were gentle. Her virgin frame had never been touched like this before. Never so gently or so intimately… It was confusing. This was Bloodshed touching him; the same mech who showed no mercy and had killed her charges. But those same hands that had killed Fender and Gadget were not violent or brutal towards her. Each touch was almost sweet, as if the mech was making love to her. As if she was his mate.

“St-Stop…!” she whimpered, shaking her helm. “Pl-Please, stop…”

Bloodshed blocked out her please, simply watching as the pink fluid coated his fingers, some of it leaking out of her valve. He swallowed hard, a hot shudder running down to his spike. The lubricant slowly trickled down his fingers and down her valve, staining them both. It was teasing him, trying to tempt him into tasting it. Primus, it looked so sweet… It was Thornstriker’s after all, so how could it not be delicious? He just wanted a taste… So badly…

Thornstriker whimpered when he pulled out his fingers, surprised when he suddenly released her wrists. But then she felt those giant hands at her thighs, gasping when he seized them and spread them apart. She jerked her helm down and stiffened in fright when she saw his mouth right against her wet valve, feeling his breath against it.

“No! No! Let go!”

Bloodshed panted hard at the opening before him. Primus… It was twitching in anticipation. Begging to be touched as more and more fluids just trickled out of the pink entrance. It looked so sweet, so delicious… He just couldn’t stop himself from diving right in, pressing his mouth right up against it while his glossa pushed inside.

“OH! Ah! Ugh! AHH!”

Her hands grabbed at his helm, digging her fingers into the metal as she desperately tried to push him away. But Bloodshed didn’t even budge as he stroked the trembling green thighs, suckling on the sweet entrance and hungrily lapping down her fluids as though it was the finest high grade. Primus, it was so sweet… So delicious… His glossa stabbed at her clenching insides, drawing more and more fluids into his mouth as she screamed at the sensations.

He knew this was wrong. Yet, he couldn’t stop himself; he would never get another chance like this again. They would never be together alone again. He would never be able to touch her or taste her like this again. Not when she was so afraid of him. Not when she thought him to be a monster.

“Please stop…!” she begged. “Please-AH! OH!”

She began to sob and cry hard, bringing up one of her hands to her mouth and biting down hard on it to keep herself quiet. Bloodshed could feel her other hand’s fingers dig into his helm, trying to push him off.

Yet, the larger mech twisted and thrusted his glossa inside, tasting and licking the sweet, hot, spasming valve. More and more of her delicious fluids filled his mouth. Her inner walls twitched and shuddered beautifully around his glossa. Primus, she was soaked… She was so close to overloading. And he wanted to taste that so badly. And she was already there… 

“S-Stop! Pl-Please!” Tears were running down her faceplates uncontrollably. “I-I feel weird! S-Stop it! AH! NGH! I-It feels weird! D-DON’T!

Her body started to spasm uncontrollably, unknowingly bucking her hips into Bloodshed’s face. Her optics widened, a new and erotic feeling building up within her body. Her virgin frame never felt anything like this before. She had never been touched like this. The furthest she had ever gone with anyone was kissing. She had been saving any intimacy for her future bondmate. She didn’t want to feel like this, but the strange feeling just got worse and worse as Bloodshed continued to wiggle inside her valve.

“Ah…! Please let go…! I feel…! Ugh! So strange – AH! Ngh! S-Something’s coming – Oh Primus! AHHH!!”

Thornstriker screamed as climax hit its peak, something exploding inside of her and the waves spreading throughout her body. She overloaded violently into Bloodshed’s mouth, who just suckled down the lubricant, savoring the sweet tangy substance. Primus, it was so sweet, so delicious… All he could do was hungrily lap it up, as if he were a starving animal who hadn’t eaten in days.

Her body just went limp, slumping back against the wall in a shaking, panting heap. Her cheek plates were bright red as her entire frame was hot to the touch, despite her cooling systems kicking with condensation dripping down her. She could only cry softly as her processor drew a blank, trying to comprehend what had just happened.

She… had overloaded. The Decepticon had made her overload from his relentless touches. They had made her feel so weird, so… dirty. This wasn’t what she had wanted. Yet, he had somehow gotten her to overload for the first time in her life. This wasn’t how it was supposed to be. She was only supposed to be around the bot she wanted to bond with…

Bloodshed pulled back from her dripping opening, licking any excess fluids from his lips. His spark sank when he saw how terrified the femme was, crying and whimpering as she tried to bury her face into her hands. Yet, even though seeing her like this was killing him, the throbbing pain resonating from his cable plating was growing more and more apparent.

Could he really do this to her? He loved Thornstriker so much and yet… He was doing this to her. He was violating her and taking her precious first time by force. But even as he tried to The bot was a virgin and because of him, his beloved’s first time would be a rape. He shouldn’t do this… He shouldn’t, but… After this, he would never see her again. He could never be with her again or see her again… This was his only chance to ever be with her.

He was so selfish. Just such… a horrible, disgusting monster.

Unable to bare the tight pain anymore, Bloodshed retracted his cable plating, allowing his thick hard cable to come into view. Taking a good look now, he could definitely see it was going to be a bit of a stretch putting it inside of her. She was so small and delicate… It would hurt. But he had to try to make it not.

The Autobot gasped when the Decepticon lifted her up onto his lap. She struggled and squirmed against him, pushing hard at his shoulders. Then she felt something hot poke at her exposed valve, making her stiffen as she jerked her helm down. She froze up in horror to see that thick huge spike poking at her valve, causing her to scream before shoving hard at his shoulders.

“No! Please!” she screamed, trying to push herself off his lap. “D-Don’t! D-Don’t do this…! You can’t…! Please don’t do this!”

He just closed his optics and slowly brought her down over his cable, growling as the tight walls resisted him. Thornstriker sobbed loudly, shaking her helm as the Decepticon continued to push inside of her, stretching her in ways she didn’t know were possible. It burned. It hurt. It felt like he was splitting her in two! She could only scream and cry out in agony, unable to comprehend was happening to him.

The Decepticon just kept the slow place, pushing in as gently as he could. A growl escaped past his lips when those tight wet walls clamped down hard around his cable. Primus, this felt so much more pleasurable than he could have ever imagined. His beloved’s insides were so wet and so hot, yet so deliciously tight… But he soon snapped out of the euphoric feeling when he glanced up at her face, seeing it twisted in pain and horror. The guilt stabbed at his spark, but Bloodshed could only ignore it, especially when he felt the tip of his spike press against the femme’s virgin glass seal.

Thornstriker screamed frantically as she tried to push herself off of his lap. “Please! Don’t do this! Just kill me if you’re going to do this! Please! You can’t do this! You can’t!”

Bloodshed just closed his optics and bit down hard into her neck cables, thrusting abruptly into that tight heat and breaking the seal.

Thornstriker threw her helm back and screamed, this one of pure agony and nothing else. Her insides widened abruptly and desperately tried to adjust the hot metal inside. Her tears streamed down her faceplates as she gasped for air. It was like she had being branded from the inside. Her insides felt like they were on fire, the bigger mech’s hot and pulsing member stretching her port to new limits.

She cried furiously, still screaming and shoving at the bigger mech, unable to do anything else.

Bloodshed opened his optics and looked down at the weeping Autobot, that horrible guilt ripping into at his spark. This was wrong – he had to stop! He had to… But the pleasure from being inside the femme’s valve overrode any of those thoughts. Even though she hated it… he would make it gentle. He would try to make it hurt as little as possible. So, gently, his hands went to her hips, only one hand coming around the femme to stroke her lower back in an attempt to relax her.

“No…!” she choked out. “D-Don’t touch me…!”

Bloodshed looked down at the scientist, unable to stop himself from pushing his spike a bit further inside that lubed, hot, and tight port.

“AH?!” she cried out in horror. “No! Take it out! Please! Take it out!” She shoved hard against her board chassis and pushed against his strong, restraining arms. “Please! Stop and take it out!”

Bloodshed remained silent as he stared down at the screaming beauty. He leaned down a bit, his lips brushing against his sensitive horns and licking them, causing Thornstriker to shiver. Bloodshed could feel her loosen up a bit.

“Just… Just relax,” he murmured quietly. “It won’t hurt as much if you relax.”

“Ugh! Ah! N-No!” Her dug his fingers into Bloodshed’s shoulder plates, desperately trying to hold on and find something to ground herself with.

Bloodshed wasn’t sure if she was actually listening to him or not, but he did feel her loosen up. Slowly, he pulled out half way before gently pushing it inside again. She screamed, but he forced himself not to pay any attention to it, pulling out of the femme again and rocking back inside.

Thornstriker arched her back and screamed in agony. “Stop it! Let me go – AH?!” She cried out when Bloodshed repeated his action, this time his lips kissing her horns as he thrusted within her. “No…! Ugh! Ah! AH! Stop it – UGH! Ngh! Oh Primus – AH!”

The Decepticon soon began to pick up a rhythm, moving at a torturously gentle pace, somehow penetrating deeper within her valve each time. Thornstriker felt sick. She wanted to die. This was disgusting… And to make it worse, it made her body hot. Her insides were growing numb and tingling from each thrust.

Why was this happening? Was this some sort of punishment? Because she had Gadget and Fender die? And Bloodshed… They had been friends before. He had been so kind, so good to be back in the Academy. He was sweet, kind, and he looked out for her. Though he never talked much, she had valued their friendship. She had even had a small crush on him for a while…

And then war happened. Then they were separated. She had only heard about him in passing among the other Autobots. He had become a fierce Decepticon warrior. How many Autobots had he killed? Primus, just how many others had suffered what he was putting her through? They had been friends before this and now… Now she was being turned into a plaything.

It was only made worse by the fact that he wasn’t even treating her like one. He was treating her like a mate. As if he actually cared for her. It made it even worse, making her cry harder as she just held onto him and prayed this would end soon. She just wanted to die as the mech moved in and out of her port, slamming his spike against bundles sensitive wirings inside her.

“No…! Stop it! Ugh! Ah! P-Please!” Tears poured down her face and he screamed as the thrusts suddenly became harder, the head penetrating him so deeply that he didn’t even know it could even reach that spot.

Bloodshed just focused his attention on his spike, which was being wonderfully squeezed by the other’s hot and tight walls. Every time he would thrust in again, he found his cable being engulfed more by Thornstriker’s sweet, wet heat. Even though she was so small, her valve had fit around his entire cable. Damn, the more he pushed in, the tighter the femme became. A part of him was so wrapped up in ecstasy that he didn’t even care anymore. He was finally interfacing with the femme he loved. After loving her for so long… He was having her. Even if she hated every second of it.

Bloodshed slammed into her again, unintentionally pressing his spike against Thornstriker’s most sensitive inside wirings. Her optics shot open in horror as she let out a scream mixed with horror and ecstasy.

“No!” she cried. “Not there! Please – Ugh?! AH!”

He thrusted harder, slamming against the set of wires to hear more of those beautiful cries. As she screamed and moaned, he couldn’t stop himself from grunting as the valve clenched down on his thick, hot spike. Fuck, he wanted to overload so badly, but he wanted Thornstriker to overload with him. He wanted to watch her reach the highest peak of pleasure, even if the femme hated every second of it. He merely grasped her hips and pounded hard against the sensitive cluster, growling and snarling at how the valve spasmed hard around him hard. He didn’t think he could last much longer and by looking at Thornstriker, he could tell he wasn’t the only one ready to explode. The scientist couldn’t hold in her moans and screams of pleasure, no matter how much she may have hated it.

Said climax was reached when Bloodshed finally snarled, biting down hard on the Autobot’s neck cables. Thornstriker let out one final scream of agony as she overloaded violently, insides spasming like mad as she released all over Bloodshed’s spike. Bloodshed kept the green femme still on his lap, following the scientist as he emptied his fluids inside the now adulterated port. It was so good… Too good… They had actually climaxed together. Something Bloodshed had only dreamed about…

Yet, his euphoric mind state ended when he looked down at Thornstriker, who was crying violently and shaking uncontrollably in his lap.

A few moments passed before a heavy feeling pooled into his stomach. He felt like he wanted to throw up. Rational thought slowly started coming back to him, which only made him feel sicker. Primus, just… How? How could he have done this to her? To Thornstriker out of all the bots in the universe?

He… raped her. He raped the femme he loved most. All because he was afraid of never being able to see her again. That… That was his excuse?! He was fucking pathetic!

Hands now shaking, Bloodshed slowly pulled out of the Autobot, carefully laying her against the floor. He reached out to stroke his cheek, only to stop when he heard her sob more. Primus… What had he done?

Thornstriker just continued to cry, curling up into a ball and crying hard into her Hands. She felt cold. Dirty. Used. Her valve ached and her thighs were sticky and gross. Why had this happened? What did she do to make this happen? What had she done wrong?

“Thornstriker…”

She winced at the sound of her name, making her cry harder. Primus, please… She didn’t want to hear him call her name like that. He sounded as if he were in pain, even though he had been the one to do this to her.

And when she felt fingers brush against her shoulder, she ended up screaming and jerking away from the hand, ignoring the pain in her lower half. All she could do was throw herself against the wall, staring at him in terror. He just looked back at with wide optics, not expecting her to do that.

“D-Don’t touch me…!” she hissed out, hands balling into fists. “D-Don’t y-you ever touch me again…!”

“Thorn-!” 

“NO!” she screamed, throwing up her arms as if to defend herself. “D-Don’t touch me! I-I hate you! You’re a monster! I hate you! Leave me alone!”

Bloodshed felt like he had been stabbed in the chest. His entire body went cold, a numb feeling coming over him. It was as if his sanity had just snapped as her words echoed through his mind, resonating deep within his spark. 

She… hated him. She had actually said she hated him. Even though he could have guessed after what he had just done… She had actually said it. With her own lips. Thornstriker, that sweet femme he had loved for so long… had just said she hated him. Because he was a monster. Hearing her say it just pushed him over the edge.

He already knew he could never take back what he had done to the femme. She already hated him and thought he was a monster… So what difference would it make if he did anything worse? He doubted they would ever meet like this again. She would probably never leave the base again while he would probably end up dead somewhere, rotting away with the rest of the filth on this planet.

It didn’t matter anymore. Nothing mattered anymore.

Bloodshed grabbed her arm and yanked her towards him, causing her to scream in terror. She kicked and shoved against him, doing everything she could to fight back. But she found herself down on the ground on her hands and knees, one of his hands keeping her pinned to the ground as it pressed on her upper back. She desperately tried to look back at him and figure out what he was doing, wiggling beneath him as she tried to get away.

“Stop!” she screamed. “N-No more! I-I can’t take it!”

But Bloodshed just stroked his cable back to hardness. Once it was fully erect, he lifted up her lower half, her aft sticking up in the air and allowing him to see her dirty valve.

“No! No, please!”

“It doesn’t matter anymore…” Bloodshed murmured, though more to himself than the poor femme. “You already hate me… This doesn’t matter.”

Then he abruptly rammed into the hot valve, groaning at how easily it accepted him this time.

Thornstriker – in contrast – threw back her helm and screamed, digging her fingers into the ground as she tried to keep herself steady. “AAAHHH?! Oh Primus! Please! Not again! Don’t!”

It was almost as though Bloodshed could no longer hear her. All he focused on was his cable inside his beloved. He was truly the worst mech alive… No wonder Thornstriker hated him and thought him to be a monster. He was disgusting, hurting the femme he loved most just because he could… But he no longer cared. All he cared about was getting what he wanted. And though he could never gain her love, at least he could get her body.

And even that, he didn’t deserve.


	3. Chapter 3

Perceptor walked back into the lab, surprised to see that his experiments were untouched and Thornstriker still absent. It was strange. The minibots should have gotten bored after an hour or so and should have come back with the scientist by now. Perhaps they had gone somewhere else? Were they out in town? He looked over at Red Alert, who was reading over a datapad at her station

“Red Alert.

She paused in her reading and looked up. “Yes?”

“Has Thornstriker come in yet?”

She shook her helm. “I haven’t seen her all day. Why?”

“She left with Gadget and Fender three hours ago and they have yet to return. I find it strange since those twins do not have a great attention span. They grow bored easily.”

Red Alert had to nod in agreement with a small smile coming onto her face. They never did like to stay in one place for too long… Still, they were with Thornstriker and it was easy to see that they were attached to the older femme. Perhaps they were off somewhere trying to impress her.

“I’ll attempt to contact them for you, if you’d like.”

“Thank you.”

The medic just nodded before looking back to her datapad. She first tried contacting Thornstriker. She was only greeted with static, her visuals flashing to her that the contact she wanted was unavailable. She was a bit perplexed, especially since the green scientist always had her link up. Maybe it had gotten damaged?

Then she tried contacting the twins. The response she was given almost made her heard stop. According to her communications module, the contacts no longer existed. Why would her sensors report such a thing? Maybe she was having a malfunction. That had to be it. If it wasn’t, then it had to be the other reason, which made her inner wirings turn cold.

Perceptor noticed the alarmed look on his colleague’s faceplates and blinked. “Red Alert?”

The medic looked at him, but didn’t answer right away. Was she just overreacting? It could have simply been a glitch in the system. Maybe she was worried for nothing. So why couldn’t she shake off this feeling that something was wrong?

“I think… I know why Thornstriker and the twins aren’t back yet.”

“What do you mean?”

“… I can’t reach Thornstriker’s comm.-link. And I’m being told that Gadget and Fender’s links… are no longer operational.”

Perceptor didn’t say anything, a familiar feeling of dread overcoming him. No. No, this couldn’t be true. Not the twins. Not Thornstriker. They were just trainees and she was just a scientist. They hadn’t even gone out into enemy territory. They were just going to be out and about for an hour or more and then come back. Not them. It couldn’t be true. It just couldn’t be.

“No… No, didn’t go anywhere dangerous. Thornstriker would never take them anywhere near enemy territory.”

“It doesn’t mean the enemy wouldn’t go near us.”

Perceptor’s vocalizer seemed to snap shut, finding himself unable to respond. She was right. There had been problems like that before. That was why it was considered so dangerous… But no. It couldn’t have happened to those three. It just couldn’t have…

“Send out a search team. We can try that at least. Maybe… Maybe we’re wrong. But we need to look. Now.”

Red Alert only nodded, contacting a few others as she sent a report to the higher-ups. She wanted to believe that they would find them. She wanted to think that they were just overreacting. That Thornstriker and the twins were fine. They were just running late… They were safe…

But this was war. No one was ever safe.

* * *

When Wheeljack and Mirage had heard their friend was missing and even possibly dead, they had immediately wanted to be a part of the search team. Arcee joined as well, fearing for her friend’s wellbeing. Mirage, Wheeljack, Arcee, and Red Alert had been searching for about an hour now and there was no sign of the twins or the scientist. Primus… 

Before they had left, Wheeljack had contacted Airstream about his sister. It was to be expected that Airstream would panic, but Airstream had nearly lost it when Wheeljack told him his precious baby sister was missing. Being bonded to the flier, all the fear, dread, and agony Airstream felt overwhelmed the poor engineer; Wheeljack almost had been unable to go with the search team since he had been overcome with his mate’s emotions.

He had been lucky enough to get the mech to calm down. He had promised Airstream they would find his sister and that she would be all right.

Now the engineer was starting to worry that he had given the other false hope.

Arcee visuals picked up something off to the right. She stopped and transformed, her friends soon following in her actions.

“Do you see anything?” Red Alert asked.

The pink femme nodded, walking toward a large pile of rocks. They seemed to have been stacked like that, as though someone had been there. She stepped closer to it, only for her pede to collide with something metal. She looked down and the minute she did, her optics widened in horror. At her pede was a hand sticking out from underneath the rock pile, the color completely drained from it. Whose hand was that? Who did it belong to?

“Wheeljack, Red,” she said, her voice quivering. “H-Help me out with this.” Then she turned to Mirage. “We’ll follow you as soon as… as we see who’s under here. Just for now… Go to the signature alone.”

Mirage nodded and went off, leaving the other three behind to dig up whoever was under the pile.

Death was nothing new to any of them. Sometimes, you and your best friend would be arguing and having fun one day, and the very next day, your friend would die right in your arms. In war, people died, no matter how much you may have loved them or how deeply you cared about them. It was the harsh, brutal truth that everyone had learned to reluctantly accept, no matter how much it pained them.

As Mirage drove off, the other three Autobots pushed the rocks out of the way, only for Red Alert to let out a small gasp in horror when she saw Fender’s carcass pressed into Gadget’s, their frames covered in each other’s blood and brutal dents and wounds. Fender’s entire right side of his helm was ripped off with a missing hand and a large hole in his abdomen. Gadget’s right pede and left leg had been ripped off of him, his chest plates smashed open by what appeared to be a fist wound. The three looked at each other, knowing perfectly well who had done this.

Wheeljack shook his helm in disbelief, gritting his dentals together in fury and agony. “Those… Those disgusting bastards… Gadgets and Fender were just sparklings! They were too young – too young and too weak! They knew these two wouldn’t stand a chance…!” 

He still continued to hiss out broken sentences, Red Alert coming up to him and rubbing his arm in comfort.

Arcee had to look away, unable to see such young bots that had once been her students in such a state. They weren’t just killed – they were slaughtered. The two never had a chance. She knew the Decepticons were monsters, but this was immoral. They were barely out of adolescence; how could anyone kill such younglings? Yet, she knew she had to accept this fact. This was war. Bots – young and old – were going to die.

She forced herself to look back at the two mechs, scanning over them for any signs of their guardian. She turned to her friends. “Let’s search the area for… for Thornstriker. She’s not… with them.”

Wheeljack and Red nodded, taking a look around the area. Arcee contacted Mirage, trying to shake off her feelings of dread. _::Mirage, have you found the source of the signal?::_

_::No, I’m still looking for it. It’s faint, but I’m close to it.::_

She nodded and let out a heavy intake _::We found Gadget and Fender… The Decepticons had gotten to them. We… We still don’t know where Thornstriker is.::_

:: _I’ll look for her from where the signal’s coming from. I’ll report back to you if I find her.::_

He slowed down as he came across a cave, the energy signal getting stronger and then becoming two signatures instead of one. Shit. Was it a Decepticon? It had to have been… Which meant he had to be careful. And be on his guard.   

He transformers and slowly walked into the cave, his shoulder lights activating. He still saw nothing, but the two signals were getting stronger as he ventured further into the cave. It was completely silent… But almost too quite. The darkness didn’t help easy his anxiety either, but he kept walking forward with his lights on.

He stopped when he came across a large trench in the middle of the cave. Maybe she was down there? It was a bit of a long drop though… Had she fallen?

Just as he walked forward a bit, a large hand clamped over his mouth and an arm wrapped around his waist, restraining him as he was pulled into darkness. He struggled a bit, but his captor wouldn’t budge. 

He was about to bite down hard on the hand, but then his attacker snarled, “Don’t say or do anything unless I say you can. Otherwise, I’ll rip your spark out. 

The Autobot froze, immediately recognizing the voice. No… No, not him. That had to have meant that Novabomb had been involved with all of this. He knew that seeker stuck to Bloodshed and Nebula all the time and that they were a team… That damned seeker always stalked him, claiming to be in love with him and wanting to be with him and all that bullshit.

And his two teammates, Nebula and Bloodshed, who just stand back and watch for their own amusement.

“You’re looking for her, aren’t you?”

He stiffened, rage and horror consuming him. He knew! The mech knew about her! Which meant… Which had to have meant he had done something to her. Oh Primus, she couldn’t be dead… Thornstriker couldn’t be dead.

“She’s alive.”

His optics widened.

“She’s alive. She…” Then he paused, the mech bigger hesitating as he tried to find the right words. But he never expected the Decepticon to sound so pained when he did. “Did you bring a medic?”

Mirage nodded once, which prompt the Decepticon to release him. He stumbled away from the other before turning to face him with a heated expression. Bloodshed just looked back at him with hollow optics and an unreadable face. Primus, his chassis was covered in blood and green pain streaks. The Autobot’s optics fell to his thighs. He didn’t know why he looked there, but he had.

And they were stained. But not with blood, no… No, this fluid was different. Clear and pink and…

“ _What did you do to her?!_ ” he snarled, ready to call the mech’s throat out.

Bloodshed didn’t answer and looked away, almost as if he were ashamed. It only made Mirage’s blood boil even more. First he had killed Gadget and Fender… And now Thornstriker… Oh Primus, Thornstriker…

“Are you going to try and kill me when she needs help?”

The Autobot felt sick. He so very badly just wanted to murder him right then and there. But he knew the other would kill him. Bloodshed was stronger than him and even if Novabomb was in love with him, Bloodshed wouldn’t hesitate to hurt him if it was in self-defense. And as much as he hated to admit it, the Decepticon was right. He needed to focus on Thornstriker. She was the only one who was important at the moment.

He didn’t have time to waste on this disgusting bastard.

He found himself unable to say anything as the Decepticon walked past him and towards the exit.

“She’s down in the trench… Get help when you find her.”

Bloodshed didn’t even stick around and just walked out of the cave, leaving Mirage to just stand there and stare after him for a minute. Primus, he just wanted to gun him down… make him pay for what he had done to the twins and Thornstriker.

But he didn’t. Instead, he turned around and started to quickly make his way down the trench. A million things ran through his mind. What condition was his friend in? How badly had she been hurt? Was she even alive? All he felt were fear and nausea as he thought about Thornstriker’s state. He couldn’t shake it off either, no matter how hard her tried.  

“Thornstriker!” he called out. “Thornstriker! Where are you?! Thornstriker?!”

When he reached the bottom, he heard a weak sob come from the darkness. He ran toward it, panting hard with his spark beating in his chassis. Dear Primus, just be alive… Just please be alive, that was all he could ask for… And when he came across an arm lying on the floor, a wave of relief came over him when he saw it was still attached to a body. But then he shined the lights over the body to get a better look. His relief quickly turned to complete horror as he gazed at his friend.

Thornstriker was completely exposed, her valve still open with mixed fluids practically pouring out of it. Her thighs were stained with lubricant and he had red paint streaks and scratches all over his back and chassis. She was on her side, her face buried into her arms as she sobbed weakly into them.

Mirage couldn’t move as he took the sight in. It was like he had been dunked into a pool of ice. He couldn’t feel his legs and he felt like he was going to vomit. How could anyone do this? How could that bastard do this to her? She never did anything to deserve this! Thornstriker was one of the few bots in the Academy that was nice to Bloodshed! And… And Novabomb had told him before in the Academy. That Bloodshed… Bloodshed actually liked Thornstriker. So why? Why would he kill her charges and rape her?!

That sick bastard – he deserved death for this! This was just so – fuck!

Another harsh sob snapped him snapped out of his thoughts. He shook his helm and quickly dropped to his knees beside the femme and, very gingerly, touched her shoulder. Thornstriker jerked away, letting a moan that sounded like a scream as she turned to face him in terror. Mirage just stared in horror when he got a good look at her face; her faceplates were stained with both tears and pink fluids, especially around her lips.

“No…!” she choked out, shaking her helm violently as she tried to back away from him. “No…! Please…! No more…! Stop it!”

Oh Primus, what was wrong with her? Couldn’t she see it was him and not that bastard Decepticon?! Mirage grabbed her shoulders and shook her once. “Thornstriker!” he cried. “Thornstriker! It’s okay!”

Thornstriker just continued to thrash and moan in agony, tears just pouring down her face. “Please…! Let me go…!”

“Thornstriker, it’s me!” Mirage shouted, wrapping his arms tightly around her in order to restrain her struggles. “Thornstriker! Everything’s okay! I’m not going to hurt you!”

It was almost as though the green femme couldn’t hear him. She swung a clenched hand at him, which collided with his cheek and sent him back. Thornstriker slammed herself against the wall, burying her face into her arms as she curled up into a fetal-like position, screaming and crying into her arms like some frightened child.

“No! Please…! No more! Please!”

Mirage shook off the punch and ran to her again, trying to yank her arms away. “Thornstriker! It’s me! It’s Mirage! I won’t hurt you! Thornstriker!”

But she just continued to scream and cry and struggle weakly against him. It was if she couldn’t see him. Her mind was still stuck with Bloodshed and all the horrible things he had made her do. Had made her feel. Mirage didn’t know what to do. She just couldn’t listen to reason!

Finally, in hopes to get her to snap out of it, he pulled her arms away from her face and, though reluctantly, slapped her across the face.

Thornstriker seemed to jolt out of her frightened and confused state. She looked up at Mirage, looked dazed and lost, as he seized her face and wiped away her tears with his thumbs. She was still breathing erratically, looking around all over the place, as if trying to look for Bloodshed.

“Shh…” he said gently, hoping to calm her down and keep her focused on him. “Shh… Everything’s okay now, Thornstriker… No one’s going to hurt you anymore. You’re all right now…”

The scientist’s optics widened as she slowly seemed to understand her surroundings. She reached out to touch Mirage, hands shaking as her fingertips brushed over his faceplates and the dent she had just accidentally given him. Then she began to tremble, the tears coming again, pouring down her cheeks faster.

“M-Mir-Mirage…?”

He nodded. “It’s me, Thornstriker… I… Me and the others came looking for you. We’re going to take you back to the base. You’re going home now.”

“I-I am…?” she sobbed, trembling even harder.  

He nodded.

And with that, Thornstriker broke down and threw her arms around his neck, wailing into his shoulder when she realized she was safe. Mirage hugged her back tightly, shaking his helm in despair. Damn that fucking Decepticon… He had completely destroyed her… Was she ever going to be the same after this? Most likely not with the way she was acting. But who could blame him?

Oh, to hell with it. He contacted Red Alert. _::Red, it’s Mirage.::_

_::Where are you?::_

_::I found… I found Thornstriker. I’ll send you our coordinates.::_

_::Is she okay?::_

Mirage couldn’t answer right away. Thornstriker was definitely alive, but okay? No, she was anything but okay.

_::Just get over here. And… And tell Wheeljack to contact Airstream. And have Arcee call Ratchet-::_

_::Is Thornstriker-?::_

_::Damn it, I don’t know if he’ll be all right! Just get over here!::_

He disconnected with her, unable to control himself. The spy didn’t have the strength to lie to anyone right now or come up with stupid, vague answers. Besides, Thornstriker was the one who needed attention at the moment. He couldn’t be bothered with anyone else. He patted the femme’s helm, Thornstriker still crying into his shoulder.

“Mirage…!” she choked out. “Oh, Primus…! Mirage…!”

“Shh,” the spy cooed gently, trying to calm her down. “Everything’s all right now. Help’s coming… You’ll be fine.”

Thornstriker shook her helm weakly. “H-he…! He f-for-forced me t-to…! So many times…!”

“Shh… I-I know… Just… Just don’t think about it, Thornstriker. He’s gone now and… And if I will make _damn_ well sure he doesn’t get near you again.”

Thornstriker just nodded once before hugging him tightly again, her cries now softer than before but still there.

Primus, it was like he was comforting a sparkling about a nightmare. His friend was older than him, even though it wasn’t by much. Normally, Thornstriker was the one doing the comforting, lending a hand or an audio to those who needed it. But age was completely irrelevant right now. She had just been through the worst kind of torture… She needed comfort and Mirage was there to give her that.

He only wish he had been there to protect her from Bloodshed to begin with. Then he wouldn’t have to comfort. She would have been okay… She wouldn’t be the broken mess she was now. Only being able to cry and hold onto him like a sparkling…

Mirage could only hug her back and wait for the others to arrive.


	4. Chapter 4

Hound had joined Mirage, Arcee, and Perceptor as they sat outside the medbay while Thornstriker was being looked over by Red Alert and Ratchet. Red Alert and Arcee had quickly transported Thornstriker back to the base while Mirage had reported to Ultra Magnus on what happened to one of his top scientists. However, the Magnus already knew about the incident from gossip. It seems as if someone had seen Thornstriker in her wrecked state and word had gotten around. So almost every Autobot on base seemed to know just what had happened to her.

Great. Wonderful. Thornstriker’s horrible encounter was going to be the hot topic of the week because that was exactly what she needed. To have everyone talk about what had happened to her behind her back. She would be humiliated over this, as though it wasn’t bad enough that she been permanently scarred by it.

He heard footsteps come down the hallway. He looked up and huffed when he saw Wheeljack and Airstream coming toward him. Primus, the look on Airstream’s face… It was like he had seen the very depth of hell itself. He stood up and walked over to him, not seeing Wheeljack silently urging him to sit back down. 

Mirage wasn’t prepared for Airstream to seize him by the shoulders and shake him once. “Where is she?” he demanded, his voice strangled with anxiety and distress. “Where’s my sister?”

“Airstream.” Wheeljack rested a hand on his shoulder. “Let him go.”

The mech did as his mate ask, leaving Mirage to collect him as he pointed to the door.

“Sh-She’s still in there. Ratchet and Red are working on her… They said that… she’ll be okay.”

Airstream laughed bitterly once and shook his helm. Everyone just exchanged nervous glances with each other. Why was he laughing? And so darkly to add to that? Primus, had the flier lost his mind at the news? Mirage shifted uncomfortably where he stood, looking to Wheeljack, who just kept his optics on Airstream.

“Okay…?” he finally said dryly. “She was _raped_ and you’re saying she’ll be _okay_?! Primus, this has ruined her! She won’t be the same after this! Fuck, why did the happen to him?! She did nothing to deserve this! _Nothing_!”

Wheeljack turned his mate toward him and grabbed his shoulders. He knew how the other was feeling, but the last thing they needed was for him to go berserk and do something stupid. Which the mech was known to do if he was pushed too far.

“Airstream, just calm down–”

“You want me to calm down?!” the seeker shouted. “My sister was raped and you’re telling me to calm down?! Did you even _hear_ who did it?! That bastard she always hung around in Academy! I told her to stay away from him, but this…! I never saw this! I should have stopped her from being with him-!”

“You getting angry isn’t going to solve anything! We can’t change what happened!”

Arcee stood up, not wanting them to break out into an argument. Especially not with Thornstriker being so close by. She didn't want her hearing this. “Airstream, you know he’s right. Thornstriker–” 

“–was raped,” Airstream growled. “She was raped and she didn’t… She shouldn’t have…”

He was suddenly choked up on what to say. He rubbed his optics, trying to calm down. But all he could focus on was his sister, his precious baby sister… Hurt and scared and unable to fight back as that monster used her for his own sick pleasure.

Wheeljack motioned him to sit down in Arcee’s seat, which she kindly offered to him. He sat down and buried his face into his hands, unable to bring himself to look at anyone. Damn it, this shouldn’t have happened. He should have been there to protect her… She never should have gone out alone.

“Airstream,” Hound said. And when the other didn’t look up at him, he glanced over to Wheeljack, who just nodded at him to continue. “I know you’re upset – we all are. Those twins are dead and Thornstriker… was hurt. But we need to be calm about this. For her. We just have to be there for her now–”

“I know… I know that, Hound…”

Wheeljack kneeled down in front of him, gently seizing his hands and rubbing them with his thumbs. He should have known this was how his mate would react. Thornstriker was his family, the only family he had ever had that actually cared about him. And he had been the only family to care for her in turn. Airstream had always looked out for her and protected her. It was like he believed he was responsible for his younger sister and her safety. It was murdering him to know that she had been hurt. It was as if he felt like he had failed her.

Wheeljack could feel it all through their bond. All of Airstream’s despair transmitted through him like an electric current and all Wheeljack could do was just hold his hand and try to comfort him. He could only send him his love and concern through the bond in hopes to ease the pain. He didn’t know what good it was doing, but he had to try. He had to be there for his mate, as he always was.

Airstream took his hands from his face to glance up at his mate. Wheeljack didn’t say anything and just continued to send everything through their bond. Slowly, the flier took his hands and brought them to his lips, kissing them as his thanks.

The door to the medbay suddenly opened, causing everyone to perk up and turn. Ratchet came out, looking tired with a solemn expression. Airstream stood up first and walked over to him.

“Is she all right?”

Ratchet didn’t say anything for a few moments. It only made Airstream worry and think of the worst. What wasn’t he telling him? What had happened to Thornstriker?!

“Ratchet,” Perceptor said, wanting an answer as well. “Is something wrong with Thornstriker?”

He finally let out a huff and shook his helm. “Physically, she’ll be fine. We got her energon levels back to normal and we buffed out the scratches and repaired the… injuries she had gotten.”

“But…”

Ratchet looked to Mirage.

“How… Mentally, how…?”

A grave look came over the medic’s face. “I don’t know.”

A heavy silence fell over them.

“Can…” Airstream hesitated for moment before trying again. “Can I see her?”

Ratchet made a bit of a face, torn between being pained and unsure. “Look, kid, I don’t think you wanna–”

“I don’t _care_ what condition she’s in, Ratchet,” Airstream hissed, hands balling into fists. “Please, Ratchet. Let me see her… Just to see how she’s doing.”

Ratchet huffed. He didn’t really want to, but it wouldn’t be right to deny Thornstriker’s brother permission to see her after what happened. Besides, she didn’t say she didn’t want anyone there. “Fine, but just you.”

“Thank you.”

Then he turned to the others, who looked completely exhausted and stressed. Not that he couldn’t understand why. “You five; go back to your quarters and get some recharge. It’s… it’s been a long day.”

Arcee stretched out her hand to him, much to his surprise.. “You too, Ratchet… You just got back in barely an hour before we brought Thornstriker back. Come. You’ve been on the battlefield for a while and–”

“I’m not leaving Red in there alone to take care of–”

The female medic stuck her helm out the door at the sound of her name. She must have been listening in for a while or perhaps they had just been too loud. Either way, she had heard what the older medic said and shook her helm. “Ratchet, I can watch over Thornstriker. Now do as Arcee says.”

“But you–”

“I’ll be fine.” Then she turned to Airstream. “She’s awake and said it was okay… Come in.”

Airstream nodded, turning to Wheeljack as they both stood up. He bent down and planted a soft kiss on Wheeljack’s cheek before following Red Alert inside.

Ratchet and Arcee went their separate ways while Wheeljack and Perceptor headed back to the lab, a cloud of dread hovering over all of them. Mirage just stood there for a few moments, hands balled into fists. Hound just watched him quietly, waiting for him to speak.

But he didn’t. He just turned and walked away. Worried, Hound followed Mirage back to their quarters. The spy just kept his optics on his pedes, making Hound more and more anxious.

Finally he spoke. “Mirage?”

Mirage didn’t look up, but his shoulders relaxed a bit. At least he had been acknowledged.

“Are… Are you okay?”

“ _I’m_  fine. It’s Thornstriker… She…”

Mirage’s vocalizer had closed up on him, making him unable to say anything. He wanted to cry, but refused. He wasn’t the one who had suffered today. He had nothing to cry about. Still, he slumped against the wall of the empty hallway, unable to walk. His best friend stood next to him, rubbing his back in an attempt to comfort him. 

Hound had never seen his friend so distressed about something before. “Hey… At least she’s alive.”

“… It might’ve been better if she _was_ dead.”

Hound’s optics widened. Did he seriously just say what he thought he said? “Mirage, what the-?”

The spy turned to face him, his optics wrapped in horror as pure guilt took over his expression. All he could do was remember when he found her. What he had seen. The poor, broken state she had been in when he came across her… It haunted him. He didn’t want to think about it, but he couldn’t get it out of his mind.

“You didn’t see _her_ down in that trench, Hound. You didn’t see… You don’t know what happened. She couldn’t even see me. She… She thought I was… She had thought…”

Hound just stared at him, confused. What the hell was he trying to say?

Mirage knew he wasn’t making sense though. But he just couldn’t find the words. Thornstriker, always so sweet and bright and happy to see people, had been…broken. Haunting. Something he had never thought possible with her.

“When I went down there, Hound… She thought I was… Bloodshed. It was like her processor was stuck on what he had done to her… All she did was scream and cry and she tried to fight me off, like I was a monster. I’ve never seen her that way. I’ve never seen _anyone_  that way.”

Damn, Mirage was more shaken by this than he thought. Hound could only imagine what the other saw, but didn’t comment on it. He only rubbed his back and gently took him off of the wall.

“Come on, Raj… Let’s get some recharge. You could really use some.”

Mirage just nodded, leaning into Hound as the scout gave him a small hug. In silence, he guided his friend back to their shared quarters. 

* * *

Airstream entered the room, the door closing behind him. He saw Red Alert walk over to his sister, whose optics were focused on the ceiling above him. Primus, she looked completely lifeless. She seemed out of it, almost as if she were in some sort daze. And her optics… So tired and lifeless and hollow… Nothing like she normally was. Smiling and bright and happy.

Airstream cringed a bit at the sight. Damn it, he just wanted to track that Decepticon down and rip his spark out with his bare hands. His sister had never done _anything_ to him. She had treated him kindly and this was how he repaid her. What Airstream wouldn’t give to see that mech murdered and smashed into a pool of his own blood.

But he pushed those thoughts away for now as he approached his sister, pulling up a chair next to the berth.

She slowly turned to him, her optics still vacant. But they did widen even so slightly when she saw his face. “Airstream…?”

Her hand weakly came up and stretched out toward him. Airstream gently took the hand within his, cupping it gently and caressing the top of it. 

“I’m here, Thornstriker… I’m here.”

She seemed to be a little drowsy, moving her helm around the room. “Wh-Where am I…?”

“You’re in the medbay,” he said softly, drawing her attention back to him. “They… They just finished fixing you up. You… You were asleep during it.”

She only gave a slow nod before she looked back up at the ceiling.

Airstream glanced over at Red Alert, who just seemed to be focusing on Thornstriker. The little scientist wasn’t looking at either of them, as if stuck in her own little world. Airstream wanted to say something, anything, but he couldn’t think of words that would comfort her. That would reassure her that everything was all right.

Because nothing was all right.

“I thought I was going to die.”

The sudden declaration frightened Airstream, who er hand a bit tighter. “But you’re fine now… That menace won’t come near you again. I’ll be sure of it. Damn it, if I have to, I’ll convince the Magnus to never let you out onto the battlefield.”

She looked down at her body. Everything was fixed up now. It was almost as if nothing had happened to her. She looked fine.

But she didn’t feel fine. Her insides still felt numb. They ached. She felt like something was still inside of her, worming its way through her body. She felt so dirty and gross… She just wanted to scrub herself down. She just wanted to be clean. She wanted to forget what had happened so badly…

But she couldn’t. Every time she closed her optics, she would see him. Bloodshed, kneeling over her. Putting his hands all over her. Being inside of her and making her do and say so much…

Tears started to pour down her cheeks, making Airstream jump.

“Thornstriker–”

“Why…?!” she sobbed out, yanking her hand from him as she threw her arms over her face. “Why couldn’t he just have killed me?!”

Red Alert quickly came over to her, trying to pull her arms away from her face. “Thornstriker, please, you need to calm down and rest–”

“Why?!” she shouted, breaking away from her. She forced herself to sit up, her tears pouring faster as she seemed to glare at them. “Even if I rest, all I can see is  _him!_  I don’t want to see him anymore! I don’t want to remember! I don’t want to remember anything…!” 

Thornstriker’s vocalizer snapped shut and she burst into tears. Airstream jumped from his seat and pulled her into a tight embrace, pressing her face into his chassis. He shushed her, trying to get him to calm down. But all Thornstriker did was cry, gripping onto him tightly as she sobbed like a lost child.

Primus, he wished he could so something to make her forget the pain. Erase those horrible memories now forever burned into her CPU. He patted her helm, whispering to her, “I won’t happen again Thornstriker. You’re safe now. You’re home.”

Thornstriker cried as she hugged her brother tightly, wailing like a sparkling into his chassis. Airstream gently kissed her forehead before his optics found Red Alert. She just stood back, face wrapped in pain, wanting to do something but unable to do anything. He felt the same, only finding himself useful it letting the femme hold onto him like a lifeline.

“Thornstriker,” he whispered gently. “It’s all right… I’m here now. You’re with friends… No one is going to come near you and try to hurt you again. I promise…” He hugged her a bit tighter. “I promise.”

The scientist sniffled, pulling away from Airstream before trying to wipe her tears away. “I’m sorry… I didn’t mean to yell at you… I shouldn’t have–”

Airstream shook his helm and seized her face, caressing her tear-stained faceplates. “Shh… No, Thornstriker. You didn’t do anything wrong. You don’t have to apologize… What you went through…” He closed his optics for a moment, trying to gather his thoughts before exhaling and opening them again. “You don’t owe anyone an apology. It’s not your fault.”

When Thornstriker just seemed to nod, Airstream gently pushed her back down on the berth. “Come on, Thornstriker… I know you don’t want to, but you need to recharge. Please?”

The green Autobot just nodded, but she resisted being pushed back down onto the berth.

“Thornstriker?” 

“I… I just can’t help it,” she whispered, almost to herself. “Just why… Why couldn’t he have just killed me instead?”

Airstream’s hands tightened on her. Primus, he didn’t even want to think about that. This was horrific enough. But Thornstriker dead? He didn’t think he would be able to handle it. Not without completely losing his sanity in process.

“Thornstriker, please–”

“I just… Bloodshed and I–” Primus, just saying his name sent chills down her spine. “We had been friends… I had thought… Maybe, maybe he would kill me and just make it fast out of mercy… But he didn’t… He just kept torturing me…!” She could feel tears come back to her optics again. “H-He acted like he was my mate! H-He wouldn’t stop…! I-I wished he had just killed me-!”

Airstream couldn’t stand hearing it anymore. He had never wanted to hear such things come her mouth. His sweet, precious sister… asking for death. It made him sick to his stomach. He couldn’t stand listening to such horrible things.

“That’s enough, Thornstriker!” he shouted, slamming his fists down onto the berth. “Please, stop talking about it! You’re safe now! That’s all that matters! It won’t happen again! Just please – don’t think about it anymore!”

The room fell into silence, Thornstriker and Red Alert just staring at him as he shook and panted hard, trying to clear his thoughts. Why? Why did this have to happen to her? She had never done anything wrong in her life. She was just an innocent femme… Hurt and broken by that bastard, the scum of the planet. He swore, he would kill that fucker if it was the last thing he would ever do.

He felt a hand touch his shoulder, causing him to stiffen. He looked back, seeing it was Red who reached out to him. She gave him a sad look, tilting her helm to Thornstriker. Airstream hesitated, but eventually turned to see his sister just stare at him with wide, broken optics.

“I-I’m sorry…” he murmured, looking down in shame. “I didn’t mean to yell… Fuck…” He calmed himself down as best as he could before starting off again. “I’m not mad at you or anything… I’m sorry.”

“N-No, no… I-It’s all right. I’m the one–”

“Thornstriker, _please_ … Don’t.”

She didn’t say anything in response and simply looked down at her hands. The silence was becoming deafening… And the room seemed much colder than before. She didn’t want to be here anymore. She just wanted to forget everything…

“Red?”

The medic looked to her.

“Do… Do I have to stay here? May I… May I go back to my quarters? Please?”

The femme’s helpless gaze made Red have to look away. There was nothing else she needed to do for her at the moment. Her injuries had been tended to and there was no internal damage. Still, she wanted to keep an eye on her. Her mental state wasn’t as stable and the last thing Red wanted was for her to hurt herself.

But seeing how pitiful the femme looked and knowing there was nothing medically she could do for her, she gave a nod. “Come back in tomorrow. I just want to run a few more tests on you. 

She just nodded and slowly slid off the berth, pedes gently touching the floor. She took a step forward, but hissed pack was a small bolt of pain shot up from her backside. She leaned against the berth to try and relieve the pain.

“I’ll walk you back to your quarters,” Airstream said softly.

He stretched out his hand to her, helping her lean against him. He would offer to carry her, but she didn’t seem interested in being touched too much. Something he completely understood.  younger of the two brothers took. Then the two of them walked out of the medbay, Thornstriker limping and leaning against his brother for support.

As the two walked down toward her quarters, neither were surprised to see that other bots were staring at them as they walked by. Thornstriker wanted to die of shame from the stares and the whispers. They were talking about her; it was obvious as Airstream escorted her back to her room. The whole Autobot faction must have known what had happened to her. This was so mortifying and humiliating. What were others going to think of her now? What were they going to say to her? She just wanted to forget the whole thing… She just wanted to be left alone.

They reached her room and Airstream helped her over to her berth. She allowed him to gently pick her up and set her down, tucking her and making sure she was comforting. She turned her back to him, hugging herself tightly under the covers.

He rested a hand on her helm. “Do you want me to stay here with you tonight?” 

Thornstriker wanted to say no, but she really didn’t want to be alone for too long either. Besides, she knew her brother all too well; he would try to persuade her until she said yes. So she gave a nod.

Airstream could sense though that she wanted to be alone at the moment. Besides, he still wanted to talk to Wheeljack for a little bit. “I’ll be right back,” he assured her.

Then he walked out of the room. When she heard the door close, Thornstriker buried her faceplates into her hands, breaking down once again.

How did this happen? Why did this happen? It had started out like such a normal day too…She had woken up from recharge. She had had breakfast with her friends. Then she had gone to work and did some research on her experiments she had been studying all week. She hadn’t been expecting Fender and Gadget to want to go out, but she didn’t see the harm… It was only supposed to be for a short while.

But then, she had fallen into a ditch. Her charges had been murdered by her former friend. Then that same friend, the one she had been close with and the one she had actually had a crush on back then… He raped her. He took her virginity from her and raped her until she was dirtied and used. Until he was satisfied. And he wouldn’t kill her by the end of it.

The things he made her do and said to her were engraved into her memory files. She was forced to do so many things he didn’t want to do. She was forced to hear things about her body that he never wanted to hear. Primus, she could still feel those large hands on her, groping her while that vile glossa teased her horns. 

She hugged herself tightly as she could hear the mech whisper in her audio receptors, “ _You’re really enjoying yourself, aren’t you_?”

Thornstriker shook her helm frantically, crying even harder into her hands. No matter how hard she tried, she could only remember the things she was forced to hear. How he forced her to kiss him, taste him, _feel_ him. She felt like vomiting.

To make it all worse, the Decepticon treated her like a lover, like a mate. He may have said dirty things to him, but he was gentle, so tortuously gentle that her body had felt a sickening pleasure from it. And then there were the times where he would kiss her with such aggression, such force and passion that it made her moan like a slut. She had never been touched before this… Now she wasn’t sure why anyone would want to be touched like it.

It had just been so… disgusting. She felt dirty. Used. Was there something she had done wrong? Had she done this to herself? She and Bloodshed had been friends… Why would he do that to her? What had she done?

All she could do was cry, unable to figure it out.  


	5. Chapter 5

Bloodshed sat on the desk in his quarters, looking down at a datapad. He didn’t actually read it though. His processor was still replaying the images from his encounter with Thornstriker over and over again, as though it were a broken video recording. He was so absorbed in his thoughts and flashbacks that he didn’t even seem to notice Nebula and Novabomb pulling him out of his seat to take him over to their room’s wash-rack. 

When he did notice, he was already inside as they sat him down on the seat, getting the water ready for him. He said nothing as he looked down at his frame, which had dried blood, dirt patches, and faded green paint marks all over it. He had a feeling his teammates knew what he had done. They didn’t ask though, which he was grateful for.

Still, he just wanted them to say _something_. The silence was killing… Especially since all he could focus on was what he had done to Thornstriker.

He watched as Nebula sat down in front of him. She started to scrub his chassis and she could see a look of frustration on her face. He wasn’t surprised. She was probably disgusted with him at the moment. He had done to Thornstriker what had been done to her a long time ago. And he had no excuse for his actions. He did it just because he could. Because he was a selfish, disgusting bastard.

As for Novabomb… When Bloodshed glanced at him, the seeker at his back and helping her wash him, he just had this blank expression on his face. He didn’t know what to say probably. Especially since he had done the same thing as Bloodshed when he had still been in “the loony bin” as Novabomb called it.

They had probably just been worried about how he wasn’t bathing. He hadn’t even eaten anything after all. Neither of them looked comfortable being around him though. Not that he blamed them.

“I can wash myself,” he muttered, even though he made no effort to stop them or to take the sponges away from them.

His teammates paused and looked at each other. Well, that wasn’t what they had been expecting. They weren’t even expecting him to talk at all, considering what had happened. But when he didn’t move, they went back to scrubbing.

“You can, but you won’t,” Novabomb said.

A heavy silence fell upon them again.

Nebula was trying to figure out what to say. She was angry with him, but she could see he was suffering from what he did. While she didn’t want to see her friend miserable, she was kind of glad he was at the moment. What he had done was beyond fucked up. Shit, had she had known he was going to do that, she never would have left him alone with Thornstriker.

She just didn’t get it. Bloodshed was in love with her. They had teased him about it all the time and while he would get angry or annoyed about it, he never denied it. Thornstriker was practically someone he worshipped and yet… It made no sense and she had no idea what to even say. She wanted to scream at him and demand to know what the actual fuck he had been thinking, but she also didn’t want to set him off. Bloodshed never had the best of tempers and considering the mood he was in now, it would probably lead to him punching her in frustration. 

Novabomb was just trying to find the right words. He was never the best with that, but he had to try… somehow. He had never seen Bloodshed so depressed before. Hell, this wasn’t even depression. This was… just something else.

He eventually just gave up and murmured, “Do… Do you wanna, you know… talk about it?”

Bloodshed didn’t any anything at first. Novabomb bit the inside of his cheek. Maybe he had said the wrong thing? He hoped he hadn’t set off the ticking time bomb. He looked to Nebula, who was just watching their captain carefully.

He didn’t do anything though. Nor did he say anything. Not even when they finished scrubbing him down and began to rinse him off. He just sat there, helm casted down as he looked at his hands in silence

Then, when they started to dry him off, he muttered out, “I’m the worst.”

It hadn’t been the answer they were expecting and they could only look at each other for a few moments before turning back to Bloodshed.

He continued anyway. “I don’t even know… I just… I lost it. She… She called me a monster and I just…” He buried his face into his hands, almost as if he wanted to cry.

“Bloodshed–”

“And she was right…” he murmured. “I am… I’m a monster.”

Nebula huffed and shook her helm. She wouldn’t call him a monster, even what he had done was incredibly fucked up and uncalled for. “You just did something stupid. She only said that because-”

“-because I raped _her_ ,” he hissed out, hands tightened around his head. “I raped her… And that was her first time… But even then… I-I couldn’t stop. I-I just kept going…”

His voice cracked and for a moment, they thought he was about to start crying. They leaned back a bit, waiting for it to happen. Primus, they had never seen him so distraught before… Maybe Novabomb shouldn’t have asked.

“I can’t even say it was a mistake…” His voice was dry and low. It was like he was speaking to himself, as scary as that was for the other two. “I knew what I was doing… And I knew. I should have stopped. I could have stopped. I didn’t… You didn’t see what she looked like. You didn’t see how destroyed she looked… how I destroyed her.”

Novabomb shook his helm, hating seeing his friend like this. “Bloodshed… Don’t beat yourself up over this. It’s not like you could control–” 

“You finish that sentence and I’ll rip your wings off,” the mech threatened.

He didn’t want to hear such bullshit. He _could_ control himself just fine. He knew what he was doing. He knew what he had done to her, how he forced her to just take him. Because he loved her. Because he was a selfish, disgusting monster from the very depths of the Pit.  

Bloodshed suddenly stood up and stormed out of the wash-rack. He walked over to his berth, gripping his helm tightly as he tried to shut the memories out. He didn’t want to think about them anymore. He didn’t want to remember what he had done to her. Or her screams. Or her crying face as she pleaded with him to let her go.

He didn’t want to remember her saying “I hate you.”

“Bloodshed.”

He looked over his shoulders to see Novabomb and Nebula behind him, looking at him as if he had gone insane.

“Look, Bloodshed…” Nebula stepped a little closer to him, but cautiously, as if he were some wild animal. “Just… Breathe for a minute. You regret what you did, so–”

“That doesn’t take it back.”

“Yeah, I know, but–”

“I know you think it too, Nebula,” he growled, turning away from him. “I know there’s a lot you want to say, but you won’t… I appreciate you trying, but you don’t have to lie. Just… Just don’t.” 

Nebula didn’t say anything else and backed away from him. She wanted to be there for him, but right now… It was just too hard. There was a lot she wanted to do and say to him, mainly about how he was a bastard for doing that to Thornstriker. But this was her friend. And this was killing him. It didn’t seem like there was much that she could say to bring him down any lower, especially not when he was already berating himself for his actions.

So Novabomb tried stepping forward.

“Bloodshed, it was just… You just snapped. I mean–”

“It wasn’t like what you did to your therapist,” he muttered bitterly. “You… You were just a teenager. You had been in that mental asylum the entire time… You didn’t know better. You didn’t know right from wrong.”

“But that doesn’t mean what I did was–”

“ _I still knew right from wrong, Nova!_ ” Bloodshed snarled, hands balling into fists.

Damn it, he didn’t want pity. He didn’t want sympathy. This was all his fault. He knew what he had been doing and did it anyway. Everything that had happened was solely on him. All because he just snapped at a few words. Words that were justified to be used against him, but words he didn’t want to hear come out of his beloved’s mouth. Novabomb’s situation had been different. He didn’t know any better. He did it because he thought that was how things were done…

But the seeker knew better now. He understood what was right and wrong. And so did he… But he still did the wrong thing anyway and hurt Thornstriker. Just because he could.

“I love her so much… And yet… I… I…”

He couldn’t bring himself to say anymore. He had nothing to say in his defense. He didn’t need to explain his actions to them. They knew what he had done. They knew it was wrong and that he was the only one to blame for his own misery.

“I know you just wanna help… But it’s not working.”

Bloodshed finally moved to sit down on his berth, keeping his helm casted down as his hands gripped his knees. His two teammates could only watch him in silence, not sure what to do or what to say. They just stood there, waiting for the mech to say something.

He finally just said, “Get out… I want to be alone.”

“Are you sure?” Novabomb asked.

“Just… Go.” 

Novabomb bit his bottom lip and looked to Nebula. She just shook her helm and huffed, heading for the door. The seeker debating on actually leaving, knowing that his friend shouldn’t be alone by himself right now. But he didn’t want the other to lose his temper and set himself off the edge. So, without much of a goodbye, they left both the room with the door shutting behind them.

Bloodshed stared down at his hands in silence for a few moments. Then he gritted his teeth, shutting his optics as his hands clenched tightly into fists.

He was the worst. He had actually… raped Thornstriker. He forced her to take him inside of her, forced her to feel him and listen to him say such… horrific things. He loved her and yet… How? How could anyone do such a thing to someone they loved. 

But he did it. And even though he just wanted to forget his sins, he couldn’t. He could only see Thornstriker’s tear stained face as she struggled helplessly against him, trying to break free and run away from him. Her screams, her pleads, her struggles… He could remember everything so vividly, so clearly. It was as if he were watching a movie. A movie where he had hurt the one he loved, all because he couldn’t stand her saying she hated him.

She didn’t need to say it now for him to know. No matter how much he regretted what he did, his sin would never go away. He couldn’t even say he was sorry… They were just weak, worthless words. He shouldn’t have done anything to even be sorry for. He could have stopped… He should have stopped. But he didn’t. And now Thornstriker was suffering because of it.

Primus, he was such a monster. Such a horrible monster.

He had no right to ask for forgiveness. He had no right to try and forget. This was his sin and he would carry it with him for the rest of his life. For doing something so horrible to his beloved… Primus, she had begged him to kill her. She would have rather been dead than what Bloodshed did to her. But he wouldn’t. He couldn’t… Yet, he did something like that to her. Forcing her to spread for him and take him, as if they were mates.

And now, she was afraid him. Now… she must have hated him more than anyone else.

Bloodshed didn’t know what would happen from that point on. All he knew was that he would probably never see Thornstriker again. He had destroyed such a pure, sweet, and kind femme all because he loved her. He loved her, so he raped her. As if that made any sense. He was nothing but scum for what he had done. Who did that to someone they loved? Who?!

But Bloodshed knew who. People like him. Disgusting lowlifes who didn’t deserve to even breathe. Just… Monsters.

Monsters like him.


End file.
